Three Italian mothers were attending a football game.
Each had a son playing on the same team. At the start of
the game, the first boy saw his opportunity, grabbed the
ball and running quickly, out-foxed the opposing team,
making the first touchdown. His mother, obviously proud
of her son, sprang from the bleachers, shouting in her
broken Italian accent, "Thatsa *my* boy! I raised him
onna da Pet milk. Ain't he-a Peach?"
Soon, the second boy received the ball and in a spectacular
run down the field, made another goal for the team. Not
wanting to be outdone by the first boy's mother, the
second boy's mother jumped from her seat, exclaiming,
"Thatsa *my* boy!! I raised him onna da breast milk.
Ain't he-a wonderful?"
The third boy, hadn't done so well, but finely someone
threw him the ball. He fumbled it, then recovered...
running in the wrong direction, fell with the ball, ran
some more, stumbled again, dropped it once more, recovered
it and finally crossed the goal line on the wrong end of the
field. The third Italian mother couldn't stand it any longer.
Rising from her place in the stands, she shouted, "Thatsa
*my* boy! I raised him onna Milk of Magnesia.
Ain't he-a the shits?"