Old Paddy Murphy took his wife to the hospital to have a baby. After waiting for a while in the waiting area, Paddy picked up the hospital house phone, called the doctor and said,
"Hello, this is Mr. Murphy. What's the news on Mrs. Murphy?"
The doctor answered,
"You are the father of a fine baby boy, but hold on because it's not all over yet."
After about a half hour, Paddy called the doctor back and asked, "Hello, this is Mr. Murphy. What's the news on Mrs. Murphy?"
The doctor answered,
"You're the father of twins, a boy and a girl, but hold on because it's not all over yet."
After another half hour, Paddy called back and asked,
"Hello, this is Mr. Murphy, what's the news?" The doctor answered, "You're the father of triplets -- two boys and a girl. It's not all over yet, but it's slowing down, so why don't you go get something to eat; I'll be here all night."
So Paddy went to a pub and got himself six shots of good Irish whiskey which he washed down with six pints of Guinness. He then went over to the phone, somewhat unsteadily, and called the doctor at the hospital -- or thought he did. Actually, he misdialled, and dialed the local cricket club. When the person answered, Paddy asked,
"Hello, this is Mr. Murphy, what's the news?"
The person replied,
"All out for a hundred and one, and the last one out was a duck."